Coconut Pepper Steak and Xavier Cougat, Mathematician

Mauretanian Entree

COCONUT PEPPER STEAK

INGREDIENTS

2 cups rice
3 tablespoons cornstarch
¼ cup dry white wine
3 green bell peppers
3 garlic cloves
3 pounds beef tenderloin
2 cubes beef bouillon
⅓ cup peanut oil or vegetable oil
¼ teaspoon chili powder
¾ teaspoon pepper
½ tablespoon salt
⅔ cup coconut milk

SPECIAL UTENSILS

Fist of Doom, kitchen mallet, or heavy can
Dutch oven

Serves 8. Takes 50 minutes.

PREPARATION

Cook rice according to instructions on package. Add cornstarch and dry white wine to mixing bowl. Stir with whisk until cornstarch dissolves. Seed bell peppers. Mince garlic cloves. Slice bell peppers and beef into strips 1″ and up to 3″ long. Smash bouillon cubes with Fist of Doom.

Add peanut oil, bell-pepper strips, garlic, chili powder, pepper, and salt to pan. Sauté on medium-high heat for 2 minutes. Stir frequently. Add beef strips. Sauté for 3 minutes on medium-high heat. Stir occasionally. Add coconut milk and smashed bouillon cubes. Bring to boil using high heat. Stir frequently. Add dissolved cornstarch in wine to pan. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 5 minutes or until sauce thickens. Stir occasionally. Ladle beef strips, bell-strips, and sauce over rice.

TIDBITS

1) This and nearly all other recipes employ fractional amounts of ingredients, such as ½ teaspoon. Fractions are learned in grammar school. This is why there are no kindergarten chefs.

2) There are precious few recipes that list “x teaspoons” and then challenge you to solve for x. There’s been some speculation that Xavier Cougat once wrote a cookbook for algebra lovers, but there’s evidence for it.

3) The letter x is a palindrome. This is why mathematicians love to use it.

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Check out my latest novel, the hilarious apocalyptic thriller, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms? It’s published by HumorOutcasts and is available in paperback or Kindle on amazon.com

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