Nothing To Be Proud Of
Everyone has life accomplishments they’re proud of. Some are amazing like playing a perfect round of golf never having played the game, parking a 18-wheeler in a spot designated for compact vehicles, trying on your summer […]
Everyone has life accomplishments they’re proud of. Some are amazing like playing a perfect round of golf never having played the game, parking a 18-wheeler in a spot designated for compact vehicles, trying on your summer […]
Dear Lord, please thank my loan officer Guido. He told me if I didn’t pay back the money I borrowed with interest he would take me to swim with the fishes. I was so excited […]
So, I turn on our local news station today to check the weather forecast when a local story came on. The news reporter stated that a woman, who met a man on Facebook, broke into […]
Dear Lord, please forgive our 5-year old daughter for using the seeds she found in her older brother’s room for a kindergarten project. She got an A+ and the teacher gave her $100 for the […]
Dear Lord, please forgive me for leaving a huge butt print on the window of the Unemployment Office. After traveling 30-miles to report that I’ve been laid off, I was greeted by a notice on […]
Dear Lord, please let my soon-to-be-wife’s hunter orange bridesmaids dresses spontaneously combust before our wedding. Having one emotional woman at the altar is awful enough, having seven teeth gritting, pissed off women, verbally castrating me under their […]
Dear Lord, please forgive me for what I’ve done. In the spirit of Easter I thought it would be fun to make chocolate Easter bunnies for the church elders who constantly tell me I’m going […]
Dear Lord, please let me win the Mega Millions Jackpot and I promise I’ll pay back all the cash I “borrowed” from Uncle Jerry’s bank accounts, mom’s wallet, the kid’s piggy banks, the company petty cash […]