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10 Jun, 2026
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“To sleep, perchance to dream” is from Hamlet’s soliloquy in Act 3, Scene 1, where he contemplates the nature of life and death, pondering whether it is better to endure life’s hardships or to seek the unknown of death through sleep. The phrase reflects Hamlet’s deep existential thoughts about the fears and uncertainties surrounding death…
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Author: Mike Morris

I'm a retired professor of psychology (University of New Haven). I publish the satirical blog UNIVERSITY LIFE and actually look like the default profile picture that accompanies my posts on HumorOutcasts.

Supporters Nervous After Mamdani Orders All NYC Employees to Wear Mao Suits

November 6, 2025 Mike Morris

Fears that Zohran Mamdani, the newly elected mayor of New York City, would impose a radical left agenda on the metropolis appear to have been confirmed by his first press conference on Wednesday.  At the […]

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Rebuilt East Wing Will Be Renamed the “Buffalo Wing,” says Trump

October 25, 2025 Mike Morris

The President announced on Saturday that the grand ballroom replacing the East Wing of the White House will be officially called the “Buffalo Wing.” “Is there a more all-American food than the Buffalo wing?” the President […]

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“No Tomahawk Missiles for Ukraine,” says Trump. “We Need Them to Take Down Chicago.”

October 20, 2025 Mike Morris

Condemning the civil unrest and crime epidemic afflicting the Windy City, President Donald J. Trump announced on Sunday that “we can’t afford to spare any Tomahawk missiles for Ukraine.  We must have them ready to […]

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United Airlines Will Begin Charging Passengers for Bathroom Visits on Cross-Country Flights

October 7, 2025 Mike Morris

“We all knew this day was coming,” said United Airlines CEO Scott Kirby at a press conference on Monday.  “Beginning November 1st, United passengers flying from one coast of the United States to the other […]

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Dept. of Labor Report: Job Opportunities for Mass Shooting Motive Analysts are Booming

September 30, 2025 Mike Morris

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer was beaming at a press conference on Monday as she announced that the number of job openings for Mass Shooting Motive Analysts (MSMAs) has increased by over 330% in the past […]

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Hegseth Defends U. S. Drone Attack on Boston Swan Boat Carrying Venezuelan Nuns

September 19, 2025 Mike Morris

A sunny, peaceful afternoon on the pond in Boston Public Garden was shattered on Thursday when a U. S. military drone blew up a Swan Boat carrying 12 vacationing nuns from Caracas, Venezuela. According to […]

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President Orders Merriam-Webster to Delete “Unpatriotic” Words from Dictionary

September 15, 2025 Mike Morris

“It’s time to pull all of these poison plants out of the ground by their roots,” President Donald J. Trump declared yesterday in the Oval Office.  Specifically, he was referring to the words “diversity,” “equity,” […]

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Las Vegas Bookmakers Are Pessimistic that American Population Will Survive RFK Jr’s Term as HHS Secretary

September 3, 2025 Mike Morris

On Tuesday, Harrah’s became the first casino in the nation to establish a betting line on the likelihood that any Americans will be left alive by the time that Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. departs his […]

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CDC Director Ousted Due to Jealousy Fueled by Her “Understated Hotness”

August 29, 2025 Mike Morris

In an episode that could have been drawn from The Real Housewives of D.C., sources within the White House have confirmed that Susan Monarez was fired from her position as Director of the Centers for Disease […]

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Fiction

Trump Orders National Zoo to Enhance the Whiteness of Its Collection

August 26, 2025 Mike Morris

On Monday, President Donald J. Trump issued an Executive Order calling for a 40% increase in the number of displays featuring white animals at the National Zoological Park in Washington, DC.  The Zoo is part […]

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