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Author: Kevin Woolery

Mostly untrue stories, and rants from an aspiring stand-up comedian, and comedy writer. Born, raised, and currently residing in Los Angeles, CA. Follow me at http://www.twitter.com/kdubcomedy

Ronald McDonald

October 23, 2011October 23, 2011 Kevin Woolery

I just saw an anorexic Ronald McDonald, he was so skinny, his McRibs were showing.

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1 CommentDaily Musings / Joke of The Day, Everyday Lifehumor, McDonald's, McRibs

The Rapture Again

October 21, 2011October 21, 2011 Kevin Woolery

Just this once, I want the rapture to be true, so the corpses at the morgue will come to life and eat Lindsay Lohan’s brain.

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1 CommentDaily Musings / Joke of The Dayhumor, Lindsay Lohan, rapture

Chinese voting?

October 17, 2011October 17, 2011 Kevin Woolery

The erections in China are really small, most people aren’t allowed to vote.

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Daily Musings / Joke of The Day

PETA Pause

October 14, 2011October 16, 2011 Kevin Woolery

If someone joins PETA, I wonder if they can still kill two birds with one stone.

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2 CommentsDaily Musings / Joke of The Day

Short People

October 11, 2011October 11, 2011 Kevin Woolery

Good news for short people, now that the NBA is cancelled for 2 weeks, you should have no problem hiring someone to reach stuff for you.

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3 CommentsDaily Musings / Joke of The Day, Sports

Tiger Woods

October 10, 2011October 10, 2011 Kevin Woolery

If you watch Tiger Woods’ life in reverse, it’s about a shitty golfer who becomes a great golfer after he cheats on his wife, instantly doubling his net worth, and ends with his dad beating […]

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3 CommentsDaily Musings / Joke of The Dayabuse, cheating, golf, money, Tiger Woods

Man vs. Food

October 7, 2011 Kevin Woolery

Just once, I’d like to see a five pound cheeseburger pull a knife and stab the guy from Man vs. Food.

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1 CommentDaily Musings / Joke of The Day

The Goldfish Who Changed the World

October 7, 2011January 3, 2012 Kevin Woolery

It was a dark and stormy night, and in a particular house on Maple Street, there lived a tiny little goldfish named Herman. Herman was home alone while his owners were at a special fundraising […]

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3 CommentsFictionassassins, cats, goldfish, religion

The Third Little Pig

October 6, 2011January 3, 2012 Kevin Woolery

After both of his brothers died in a terrible wolf eating accident, and following the fortunate burning of the big bad wolf, the third little pig had an unplanned wolf feast. See, the wolf was […]

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Fictionfairytale, sequel, three little pigs

Engagement

October 4, 2011 Kevin Woolery

I had a pretty exciting weekend. My girlfriend wants to get married, so I finally broke down, and signed her up for eHarmony.

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1 CommentDaily Musings / Joke of The Day

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