My sports-impaired wife
I love my wife. Don’t get me wrong. She’s a great life partner, but she’s a lousy sports partner. The problem is she is utterly clueless about sports. Like any patriotic American, I’m a huge […]
Author: Tim Jones
Tim Jones is a humor writer based in Seattle and the one person to blame for the humor blog View from the Bleachers. Tim ponders important issues like “are all teenage daughters evil?” and “why does Montana hate me?” and “can your dishwasher destroy your marriage?” Tim’s not afraid to tackle controversial issues. He was the first techno-religion expert to conduct a side-by-side comparison of the iPad and Jesus Christ. From Politics to Parenting to Pop culture, if the subject begins with the letter P, Tim has something profoundly uninformed to say about it.
I Have Discovered the Fountain of Youth
I’m 61 years old. You can’t fool me with platitudes like “60 is the new 45.” Let’s face it. The man in the mirror is looking very rough around the edges – and frankly, he’s […]
My Spirited Defense of Donald Trump
Donald Trump is a great American. In the past nine months, he has done a masterful job of uniting millions of Americans from all different backgrounds – admittedly mostly by uniting them in their deep […]
Don’t Let Email and Facebook Take Over Your Life
There is a growing problem in this country. It’s the bombardment of messages we receive virtually nonstop every single day, thanks to the increasing omnipresence of email, text messaging and social media in our lives. […]
Husbands’ guide to hosting a winning Super Bowl party
Sunday, February 7th is the biggest single day of the year in sports: No, I’m not talking about the Fresno Kennel Club Annual Dog Show taking place this coming Sunday – although granted, that is […]
Be Prepared for the Apocalypse – Oh, and Have a Nice Day
Hi, everybody. Hope you’re having a super day. Have you been following the news? If not, I’ll let you in on some late-breaking news. Our world might not be around much longer. You see, experts […]
My Plan to Donate My Powerball Jackpot Winnings to the Kids in Africa
I was really bummed to learn that I did not win the recent $1.6 billion Powerball jackpot. I was so close to winning it all. I was only off by four or five numbers. Drat! […]
The secret to maintaining your New Year’s Resolutions…
… is never to make any, of course. I mean, seriously. Just look at my track record over the past twenty years. It’s January 2016 – a new year and another chance to wipe the […]
Announcing My Candidacy for President of the United States
I am Tim Jones – a professional humor writer and story-teller. For months now I’ve been watching all of the presidential debates, and I’ve heard some pretty incredible promises by the 16 serious candidates running […]
The Real Meaning of Christmas – Decorations
When it comes to the real meaning of Christmas, nothing says I love Jesus more than a giant 6’ inflatable Costco Santa Claus snow globe on your front lawn. And let’s face it, next to […]