Unicorn Bites 4/27/14
Wife: Your beard is ugly. Shave it off. Me:*shaves it off* Wife: Never mind. The problem is your face. I get it, single people. I get it. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 27, 2014 3-year-old: […]
Tag: fist bump
Unicorn Bites 1/8/14
How to pick up chicks: 1) Go to the bar. 2) Shout random “Star Wars” quotes. 3) When a woman yells back the next line, marry her. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 8, […]
Unicorn Bites 11/10/13
Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice. Unless you piss them off. Then it’s shit storms and spite and you pay the price — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2013 […]