The difference between Brits and Yanks
1) You say tomato 2) We say tomato 3) We clap politely and might, if extremely excited, mutter ‘Bravo!’ 4) You whoop and holler and let loose with your Smith and Wesson six shooters 5) […]
1) You say tomato 2) We say tomato 3) We clap politely and might, if extremely excited, mutter ‘Bravo!’ 4) You whoop and holler and let loose with your Smith and Wesson six shooters 5) […]
Hello! I’m back! I thought I’d let a suitable hiatus intervene after my recent epic daily postings of the Eric Preet Serial. This whimsical article was inspired when an airbrush illustrator friend of mine told […]
AND, INDEED, I was. Brenda was relentless. The next day was Sunday and she was still hard at it, or, rather, me. If I had been hoping to commit the seventh deadly sin of sloth, […]
“AYE, AYE, WHAT’S all this then?” It was Saturday morning. Through my bleary vision I could just make out the form of a policeman. I thought the film makers must have come back and that […]
I AWOKE IN THE gutter outside a cake shop. With her money, Bounteous Brenda hadn’t exactly been forthcoming. But with her body, well, she had been absolutely fifthcoming. Let’s just say that was a night […]
BROMLEY! THE SORT of sleepy suburbia that should be the bed-manufacturing capital of the world. I was going to claim what was rightfully mine. I rang the doorbell and got no response. I pressed harder. […]
I WAS IN PRISON for the whole of Wednesday. Prisoners were allowed newspapers and I speed-read the front page headline: ‘Wotta Lot o’ Lotto!’ Huh. Another undeserving lottery millionaire. Why couldn’t I get a look […]
CONSCIOUSNESS RETURNED and I couldn’t believe my eyes. They were in a jam jar on the bedside table. I could see myself lying on my back in a hospital bed. Immediately, I screwed my eyeballs […]
I WOKE UP. I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered how someone could look so perfect first thing in the morning. And I wasn’t even Jane Asher. I checked the letterbox. Yes, the […]