The difference between Brits and Yanks
1) You say tomato 2) We say tomato 3) We clap politely and might, if extremely excited, mutter ‘Bravo!’ 4) You whoop and holler and let loose with your Smith and Wesson six shooters 5) […]
Author: Simon Ellinas
Cartoonist, caricaturist, humorous writer and video producer. Humour's the big thing.
Michelangelo – The Missing Years
Hello! I’m back! I thought I’d let a suitable hiatus intervene after my recent epic daily postings of the Eric Preet Serial. This whimsical article was inspired when an airbrush illustrator friend of mine told […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Sunday
AND, INDEED, I was. Brenda was relentless. The next day was Sunday and she was still hard at it, or, rather, me. If I had been hoping to commit the seventh deadly sin of sloth, […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Saturday
“AYE, AYE, WHAT’S all this then?” It was Saturday morning. Through my bleary vision I could just make out the form of a policeman. I thought the film makers must have come back and that […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Friday
I AWOKE IN THE gutter outside a cake shop. With her money, Bounteous Brenda hadn’t exactly been forthcoming. But with her body, well, she had been absolutely fifthcoming. Let’s just say that was a night […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Thursday
BROMLEY! THE SORT of sleepy suburbia that should be the bed-manufacturing capital of the world. I was going to claim what was rightfully mine. I rang the doorbell and got no response. I pressed harder. […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Wednesday
I WAS IN PRISON for the whole of Wednesday. Prisoners were allowed newspapers and I speed-read the front page headline: ‘Wotta Lot o’ Lotto!’ Huh. Another undeserving lottery millionaire. Why couldn’t I get a look […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Tuesday
CONSCIOUSNESS RETURNED and I couldn’t believe my eyes. They were in a jam jar on the bedside table. I could see myself lying on my back in a hospital bed. Immediately, I screwed my eyeballs […]
Eric Preet’s Week of Sins: Monday
I WOKE UP. I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered how someone could look so perfect first thing in the morning. And I wasn’t even Jane Asher. I checked the letterbox. Yes, the […]
