Six weeks ago, I awoke to find myself stuck to my living room floor covered in pine sap and tinsel. Two squirrels were giving me the stink eye and clutching their nuts. I felt shock…
With the simple act of the mail being delivered, it’s officially the holidays in the Nolan house. The Vermont Country Store Christmas catalog has arrived. I am ready to bring the tree in, string the…
Artwork by Eli Connaughton. Idea/text by Bill Spencer.
Eli Connaughton as artist website: http://www.chickenwisdom.com/
Eli Connaughton as writer website: http://www.eliconnaughton.com/
Eli Connaughton
One of my favorite Holiday Season pastimes is driving around admiring Christmas lights. In other words, wasting lots of fuel in order to enjoy the creative ways my neighbors have chosen to waste lots of…
After fleeing the pharmacy because I just couldn’t bring myself to listen to one more Rumpa-pum-pum, I went online and asked my Facebook friends: What’s your least favorite Christmas song? The first response? “Grandma got…
Artwork by Eli Connaughton. Idea/text by Bill Spencer. Eli Connaughton-as-artist website: http://www.chickenwisdom.com/ Eli Connaughton-as-writer website: http://www.eliconnaughton.com/ Bill SpencerBill Spencer's humor writing has been published by Funny Times, Narrative magazine, Reader's Digest, The Sun, The Inconsequential,…
Artwork by Eli Connaughton. Idea/text by Bill Spencer. Eli Connaughton-as-artist website: http://www.chickenwisdom.com/ Eli Connaughton-as-writer website: http://www.eliconnaughton.com/ Bill SpencerBill Spencer's humor writing has been published by Funny Times, Narrative magazine, Reader's Digest, The Sun, The Inconsequential,…
Artwork by Eli Connaughton. Idea/text by Bill Spencer. Eli Connaughton-as-artist website: www.chickenwisdom.com/ Eli Connaughton-as-writer website: http://www.eliconnaughton.com/ Bill SpencerBill Spencer's humor writing has been published by Funny Times, Narrative magazine, Reader's Digest, The Sun,…
The Apostles all kept telling him he needed to lighten up, he was running off potential converts with the heavy sermonizing, so he decided to try stand-up. Once the crowd was sitting around the top…
(This piece previously appeared in Clever magazine.) My wife refuses to let me be the one to put lights on our Christmas tree each year. She says I’m still too haunted by my father’s traditions…
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