Primary Colors
Approaching Indiana’s May primary, I found myself full of double negatives: That is to say, I flipped a coin to determine who I least wanted to vote against. Maybe that’s not technically a double negative, […]
Tag: presidential elections
I’m Packin’ So You’re Wrong
An election year is truly a polarizing event. Actually, it’s more like Halloween. Because people you see every day, people you usually get along with, suddenly appear before you wearing the ghastly costume of reactionary […]
The Ex-presidential Wannabe
And from the Irrelevant News Desk: Ross Perot has declined to endorse any presidential candidate since he cannot make up his mind who will be a worse president. And after reading his non-committal and worthless […]
Is Miss USA Rigged?
At least two contestants from Miss USA are claiming that the pageant, the baby of Donald Trump, is rigged. Miss Pennsylvania and Miss Florida claim they saw a document which listed the five finalists. The […]
The Mystery is Solved: Todd Palin Endorses Newt for President
Todd Palin, husband of Sarah, father of Dancing with the Stars talent, Bristol, ex-father-in-law to be of “author”Levi Johnston and hunter of anything that moves in Alaska has decided to endorse Newt Gingrich for president […]
Gingrich a Synonym for Stupidity?
Newt Gingrich told an audience at Harvard University that child labor laws are stupid. He also suggested that schools fire union janitors and replace them with students who would get paid to clean their schools. […]