Year: 2024
Peanut Brittle Prices Soar as Ozarks New Center of US
GUM CREEK, Mo. Clell Fulsom, a crawdaddy fisherman and long-time postmaster of this town of 230, is mildly surprised when this reporter tells him it would be considered “tacky” in other parts of America to […]
Allergies Are Nothing To Sneeze At
When I complained to my surgeon that I was still having symptoms of sinus problems, he stuck a big metal tube up my nostril and worked it around for half an hour. Then he stuck […]
As World Tensions Rise, Blinken to Hold “Dirty” Louie, Louie Lyrics
WASHINGTON, D.C. Responding to concerns about his age as the campaign season kicks into high gear, President Joseph Biden agreed to turn over one of the nation’s most closely-guarded secrets, the “dirty” version of the […]
Dear MAGA People,
First off, please note that I wrote ‘people’ with a capital ‘P’ on the front as a sign of respect, but I fully realize that is probably lost on you since you do not have […]
Encampment Protestors Claim Victory as Harvard Divests Itself of All Blockbuster, Montgomery Ward, and Sears, Roebuck Stock
“What can I say? The students won.” With those words, Harvard’s Acting President, Alan Garber, signed an agreement yesterday in which the university pledged to liquidate its investments in Blockbuster, Montgomery Ward, and Sears, Roebuck. […]
The One About Raquel Welch And My Colon
I’m a child of the sixties and seventies – our legacy is dancing naked in the mud at Woodstock and protesting a war which made little sense and Hunter S. Thompson driving through the desert […]
A Day in the Life of a Supermodel Armpit Makeup Artist
Supermodel Gisele Bundchen had “to hold really still whilst makeup was applied to her armpits.” The Boston Herald It was 6:30 a.m., and my CD player-alarm clock sounded the opening notes of Albeniz’s “Asturias,” which […]