Written After Reading Too Much Stephen King
Donnie was sitting in the kitchen eating Tofutti and talking softly with Teenie, a little boy who lived in Donnie’s liver. Donnie never knew how Teenie got into his liver. It must have been all […]
Tag: kids
Bad Mom/Good Writer
So, my 9th-grade son got in trouble for looking up Arab jokes on-line in Language Arts class. I’m not sure how I should feel about myself in that I wasn’t angry about the racist implications […]
Halloween: Life Lessons in Costumes and Candy
Some people believe that Halloween is merely an opportunity to dress up and get free Reese’s. But if you dig a little deeper, it’s clear there’s so much more going on. Halloween can bring parents […]
Life in the Good Old Days
Don’t let any of the over-55 crowd tell you that life was better when they were growing up. It wasn’t. I know, because I was there. We didn’t know at the time how miserable we […]
The Great Catholic Halloween Caper
It was Halloween of 1955, and the kids of St. Joseph’s Catholic Elementary School had been looking forward to it, along with every other kid in the United States. We got to dress up in […]
I Ain’t What I Used To Be
I used to have a friend, Penelope, who had four kids and always seemed perfectly pulled together, like June Cleaver in size zero rhinestone-studded jeans and stilettos. She was typically the team mom, and she’d […]
I Might Like Prozac Barbie After All
I often shop at the upscale, Just Plucked fresh food market in my suburb, but I stick out like Peg Bundy in Tiffany’s. All the ladies wear tennis outfits or dark, rhinestone-studded jeans with stilettos. […]
Friday Humor Devotional
Dear Lord, please remind me why I shouldn’t strangle my older children for telling our five-year-old son if he covers his grandpop’s corns with dirt while he’s napping they’ll grow popcorn trees and if he puts his grandma’s dentures in backward it’ll cause her to eat her […]
Memoirs of an Out-Crowd Kid
You’ve heard of In-Crowds, right? Every school has them, even Catholic schools, where they used to make kids wear uniforms, form lines and try to look pious. Some kids just naturally fall into the Cool […]