My ninth-grade English teacher was named Sister Mary Barbara, but for purposes of anonymity, I’ll call her Sister Mary Barbarian. She was the toughest, strictest, unyieldingest teacher I ever had—a member of the order the […]
Today I saw a car with a bumper sticker that said “Guns 4 Nuns.” I went to Catholic school for twelve years. Trust me. The last thing those sadistic penguins need are firearms.
http://gty.im/98539397 The public elementary school close to our house wasn’t good enough for the Minicozzi kids, according to our Grandma McNeely. They didn’t teach the Catholic religion there. So off to Catholic school we went.
I was not a remarkable kid. Most of the other Fifth Grade girls were prettier than I was. I was an ugly duckling who didn’t turn into a swan (or at least a pigeon) until […]
A 1950s-60s Catholic school upbringing is like Superglue. It really sticks. (Sister Adolfa, wherever you are, please notice my clever use of simile. … Yes, Str, I know the difference between a simile and a […]
I was asked recently, “What story had the biggest impact on me when I was a child.” My response was: My older brothers made me read a story when I was in second or third grade, […]
My onstage debut was unforgettable. I was Innkeeper No. Two in St. Joseph’s Elementary School’s Annual Christmas Pageant. That was the year that we First Graders were reenacting the Nativity as our part of the […]
When I was in Catholic school and was finally old enough to become an altar boy, I eagerly went to the meeting to sign up. To be honest, I can’t remember why I wanted to be […]
It was Halloween of 1955, and the kids of St. Joseph’s Catholic Elementary School had been looking forward to it, along with every other kid in the United States. We got to dress up in […]
Before anyone comes at me with holy water and an exorcism prayer, let me explain that I am a good Catholic. I go to mass; I carry a rosary in my purse; I believe in […]