Unicorn Bites 5/26/13
My 1 y.o. brushed her teeth today. She didn’t use toothpaste and she put the wrong end of the brush in her mouth. Whatever, I’m counting it. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 26, 2013 My […]
The Place to Take a Humor Break
My 1 y.o. brushed her teeth today. She didn’t use toothpaste and she put the wrong end of the brush in her mouth. Whatever, I’m counting it. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 26, 2013 My […]
While performing in a theater in Las Vegas, Wayne Newton says that he saw the ghost image of Elvis standing on a balcony. How could anyone doubt him? Of course it was real. Where in […]
I’m not crazy. I’ve just subscribed to the Amanda Byne’s wellness plan.
You can sell almost anything to me, if you advertise it on television. Ads on my computer annoy the hell out of me. Junk mail and magazine ads get tossed away, unread. But I am […]
Each day, my email is filled with educational opportunities that promise to put me on the path to financial success and personal satisfaction. I have to admit that some of these emails grab my attention. […]
Last week I started getting into Twitter for the first time and I’m not going to lie and say I hate it. Twitter is great for someone like me who over-elaborates things to such an […]
I don’t get why people are mad about horse meat in fast food. If you cared what you put in your body, you wouldn’t eat at Burger King anyway — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 25, […]
At a recent congressional hearing regarding a bill that would ban abortion after 20 weeks of pregnancy, Texas Representative Louie Gohmert told a female witness that she should have carried her pregnancy to term even […]
Sometimes your day just doesn’t go right. For example, in the morning your ex gets run over by a school bus. And then, later in the day, you lose your job driving a school bus. […]
Dear Lord, please give me the strength to explain to my 80-year-old grandfather that slipping his Viagra under grandmother’s breasts won’t keep them erect, Amen.