This guy is too old for his haircut:
Jill and I were conversing on matters of importance with our dinner guest. I happened to mention that between 365 million and 986 million birds are killed each year by crashing into windows which on […]
My stages of drunk: 1) I don’t feel buzzed. 2) I’m drunk, but I’ll pretend I’m not. 3) Fuck it. I’m wearing a kilt. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 4, 2014 Me: I DON’T HAVE […]
A bro helps another bro out. It’s the law. Thirsty Dave had a bit of a technical issue going down and I was only too eager to help. You never know, one of these days, […]
Mom has this bad habit of opening a window wherever she is. A car, your home, in every room. Needless to say I’m afraid to fly with her.
I have to wonder what the neighborhood birds think about me. I maintain bird feeders and bird baths in the backyard and front yard. The “rest stop” for my feathered friends lie within five feet […]
It’s true that your eyes are the windows to your soul, unless you have a glass eye, then it’s just a window to your empty eye socket.