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Author: Linda Roy

Linda Roy is a humorist, writer, musician living in New Jersey with her husband and two boys. Her blog elleroy was here is a mix of humor and music she refers to as "funny with a soundtrack". She is Managing Partner and Editor-in-Chief at the politics & pop culture website Lefty Pop and was named one of BlogHer's Voices of the Year for 2014. Her work has appeared at The Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, In the Powder Room, Aiming Low, Funny Not Slutty, Erma Bombeck Writer's Workshop, Midlife Boulevard, Mamapedia, Sprocket Ink, The Weeklings, and BonBon Break. She's the female Larry David, and will criticize your parallel parking to prove it. When she's not snarking and kvetching, she's fronting the Indie/Americana band Jehova Waitresses.

Can I Get An Ale, Man? Sweet Baby Jesus Beer Taken Off Store Shelves

June 16, 2015June 16, 2015 Linda Roy

photo by Michael Bentley / CC BY  A Cleveland, Ohio grocery store chain is pulling beer off its shelves after experiencing a come-to-Jesus moment with local customers. In a classic case of “you got your […]

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10 CommentsFictionBallad of Ricky Bobby, beer, DuClaw Brewing Co., Heinen's, Sweet Baby Jesus, Sweet Baby Jesus beer, Talladega Nights, Will Farrell

Shark Can’t Wait to Be Reunited With Surfer After Attack

May 29, 2015 Linda Roy

Photo by San Diego shooter / CC BY FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. – A tasty wave rising above the horizon was just too much to resist for a local surfer who lost an arm in a […]

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4 CommentsGood Clean Funshark, shark attack, surfer

Fortune Ate Lee

April 21, 2015 Linda Roy

Remember Mr. Lee from that old Calgon commercial? That guy lied about his “ancient Chinese secret” and I think fortune cookies do too. I’m on to you, fortune cookies. You’re all full of your vague […]

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3 CommentsLifestylefortune cookies, fortunes, fotune cookie meanings

Jesus! The Kim Kardashian Interview

March 12, 2015 Linda Roy

Jesus: Hello, My children, and welcome to My show! It’s about time the “Powers That Be” gave Me My own show; I was sick and tired of seeing everybody else get one and not Me. […]

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2 CommentsFictioninterview, Jesus, Kanye, Kanye West, Kardashians, Kim Kardashian

Name That Llama

February 28, 2015 Linda Roy

The internet blew up this week as two llamas busted loose in Arizona. The full-on Llama Drama reached an almost OJ-Bronco-chase fever pitch complete with memes and near llama hysteria. With so many people jumping […]

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11 CommentsGood Clean FunLlama Drama, llama names, llamas, llamas in Arizona

Horton Hears a Hoo-Ha

January 23, 2015June 16, 2015 Linda Roy

There’s a Hoo-Ha in Whoville The thing is bright pink And its stink is much stinkier than the stink from a Gink Its color’s more vivid than you’d ever think And when folks down in […]

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2 CommentsFictionDr. Seuss, Hoo-ha, poem, poetry, The Whos, Whoville

Attention Animal Lovers: Join the Furry Fandom!

January 8, 2015January 8, 2015 Linda Roy

Have you ever wished you were your cat? Dreamed of spending your days curled up on the bed swatting at balls of yarn, only getting up to cough up a hair ball and snort an […]

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1 CommentLifestyleanimal role-play, anthropomorphism, fur con, furry fandom, weird hobbies

Jesus’ ‘Most Fascinating People’ Interview: Justin Bieber

December 16, 2014December 16, 2014 Linda Roy

Good evening My children, and welcome to My show. I’m interviewing the most fascinating people out of all My children, so naturally I wanted to get inside the head of the spellbinding Justin Bieber. Of […]

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2 CommentsFictioninterview, Jesus, Justin Bieber

It’s True, I’m the Female Larry David

December 8, 2014December 8, 2014 Linda Roy

I’m not gonna lie to you. I’m the female Larry David. My husband will back me up on that. Let’s just call him Cheryl. I was in the HBO store the other morning and I decided […]

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8 CommentsMovies & TVCurb Your Enthusiasm, female Larry David, HBO, Larry David, TV

Deep in Hell Yoga

November 11, 2014November 11, 2014 Linda Roy

As Winter looms, it dawns on me that the couch where I will spend much of the ensuing months bundled in the cocoon-like security of a five dollar 100% polyester Walmart blanket that has no business being […]

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9 CommentsLifestyleHell, vinyasa yoga, yoga

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Cartoon: Ok, ok I didn’t say Former President Trump lost or that my marriage is on the rocks, I said if there’s a Metaverse for Spidey, than Trump could be an alternative President and me and George could be drinking ‘Pina Colodas and taking walks in the rain.’

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