Donald Trump’s Latest Five-Day Weather Forecast
Welcome back to Fox News. In a moment, we’ll get to our top story – why 97% of Americans think Donald Trump is a better president than Abraham Lincoln, according to a recent Fox poll […]
Tag: weather
When the Weather Outside Is Sweaty
Joyce Eisenberg and Ellen Scolnic write, speak and blog together as The Word Mavens. Northeast on Fire! Massive Heat Wave Bearing Down! No Relief in Sight! When summer comes, TV weather people shout these teasers […]
Ambient Snow Noise
At my chiropractor’s the other day (her office, not her home), she was playing one of those ambient noise CDs that’s supposed to relax you. At the time she was pushing my spine into my […]
Nice Winters, and Other Strange Concepts
We had such a nice, warm winter going on there. (Well … when you say “nice winter”, that’s always relative. But in northern Indiana, if the temperature stays above freezing for any amount of time […]
Tornado Season–Twisted Twisters, or: Breaking Winds
Some say the best advice you can give people when it comes to tornadoes is to keep your insurance paid up and update your will. I prefer to be a little more optimistic. Still, my […]
Singing Up a Spring
Hey, I wrote a song! It’s not a great song … but then, I’m not a great song writer. There are two problems: First, I meant it to be humorous, but it comes off as […]
In Praise of Snow Plows
I live on a state highway, so I generally wait to shovel my front sidewalk until after the plows have gone through. (Okay, the neighbor’s been snow blowing my front sidewalk, having apparently taken pity […]
Everybody Jokes About The Weather, But Only the Desperate Move
Somebody asked me the other day why I don’t write humor columns about the weather these days. It’s the same reason why I don’t make many political jokes: They’re just not funny anymore. I’ve endured […]
Weather Has Left The Build…er…City
So today, my weather ap says that it’s a balmy forty-two degrees outside. But the other day, when I opened up that ap to see how cold it was, I discovered that we actually had […]
I hope you winter lovers are satisfied
Well, everybody wanted a white Christmas. There you go, if you live around here: White Christmas. So, Christmas is over now. It can all … un-whiten up. Here, let me check the forecast. Nope. Some […]