As I sat in my 5th Grade English class, I slapped both hands over my mouth to prevent words, begging to be released, from erupting. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but I also […]
I’m not going to lie to you: 2014 sucked. Everybody got sick or hurt at least once, and the world’s a train wreck. On a personal level I lost my first writing job after twenty-three […]
BLACKSBURG, VA – Scientists conducting trials concerning the use of marijuana say that in addition to peer-reviewed publications citing its effectiveness against depression, nausea, uncontrollable muscle spasms, poor appetite, seizures, glaucoma, insomnia, arthritis, asthma, Crohn’s […]
SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK I can make fun of anything. It’s my job. For instance, last July, as we stood on a scenic overlook over the Mississippi River in Missouri (you can’t look at […]
My dad had a great sense of humor. He showed me many times the value of being able to laugh at yourself and the world around you. When he was diagnosed with late-stage metastatic cancer […]
ARIES: You are going to be tossed out of college on your patootie after you call the Dean a pretentious douchebag with a small dick. This will be the first of many idiotic mistakes in […]
The horoscopes we see in newspapers and magazines are always flattering to people, no matter what sign of the Zodiac they were born under. In an effort to correct that gross misrepresentation, I present The […]
I want, you want, we all want and that’s just the way things are so get over it. I’m not going to blame Bon Jovi on this but I’ll blame them on something later on. […]
I keep seeing these races “for a cure”… Sure, physical fitness is important for health, but can’t we try something else possibly involving labwork or something?
There are many horrible things in the world: cancer, poverty, war. I’d like to add fruit fly infestation to the list.