Unicorn Bites 4/28/14
My 1-year-old thinks her name is “Go watch TV,” so, yes, I’d say I’m a good parent. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 28, 2014 Me: That milk came from a cow. 3-year-old: What animal did […]
Tag: pooping
Unicorn Bites 3/15/14
Don’t do drugs, kids. The extra demand drives up the price. Wait, I mean because drugs are bad for you or something. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 15, 2014 Not to brag, but I pooped […]
WHAT’S INSIDE: A Cut the Crap Dating Site
Tired of Match.com? eharmony not doing it for you? ChristianMingle has sapped your faith? Well… [embedplusvideo height=”252″ width=”420″ editlink=”http://bit.ly/1n8KQkP” standard=”http://www.youtube.com/v/f39L1HX0xZw?fs=1″ vars=”ytid=f39L1HX0xZw&width=420&height=252&start=&stop=&rs=w&hd=0&autoplay=0&react=1&chapters=¬es=” id=”ep3780″ /]
Unicorn Bites 12/3/13
In social situations, my 3-year-old recites random facts. Her favorite is, “When you and mommy get old, you’ll die.” She’s fun at parties. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 3, 2013 No, I didn’t […]
Unicorn Bites 11/24/13
Wife: "It’s colder than a witch’s tits." Me: "I wouldn’t know. You never let me touch them." And that’s when she ripped off my balls. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 24, 2013 My […]
YOU’RE PUTTING WHAT . . . WHERE?
I have had low back issues for years and thankfully through Chiropractic care I have maintained this annoyance until just recently. However, all good things seem to come to an end sometime. My sometime […]