Stop The Snow … And the Disney Songs
I first posted this a couple of years ago, but it seemed really appropriate today, since as I type this there’s a winter storm raging outside. I hate winter storms. Well, only if I have […]
Tag: frozen
Humans employ zombie bite to reanimate Walt Disney
By Itsas Tretch Staff Sc-why-ence & Technol-oh-no-gy Writer Walt Disney — American entrepreneur, cartoonist, animator, film producer and theme park creator — was cryogenically frozen after he died in 1966 so he could be reanimated […]
Stop the Snow
This has been a mild winter for us, and spring seems to have come as an early, unexpected (and probably temporary) surprise. But to remember how it usually is, and will be again, I wrote […]
Nope. Still don’t wanna build a snowman.
I wrote this back in February of last year, and for some reason I started thinking of it again this weekend. Really, it works best if you have the music playing in the background while […]
I don’t want to build a snowman
Maybe you’ve seen “Frozen”. Maybe you’ve been frozen. Either way, I think you can relate to how I changed the song’s words, to reflect my feelings about winter. If you’re not familiar with the song, […]
Unicorn Bites #587
Midwest weather update: My snowman just froze to death. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 8, 2015 Me: Why don’t you listen to me? 4-year-old: You don’t have enough dragons. Me: Dragons aren’t real. 4: Not […]
Unicorn Bites #578
Professor: Which dynasty came after the Ming Dynasty? Me: Professor: Me: Duck? — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 2, 2014 Wife: You didn’t do anything today. Me: I quit smoking. Wife: You never smoked. Me: OK. […]
Unicorn Bites #538
4-year-old: I put my Barbie in the tanning bed. Me: You don’t have a Barbie tanning bed. 4: Me: *sprints to the toaster* — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 24, 2014 Me: Why do you have […]
Unicorn Bites #519
Me: Don’t drink soap! 4-year-old: But I want to fart bubbles. Who am I to stifle her dreams? — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 5, 2014 4-year-old: Why’s he holding up his thumb? Me: He’s hitchhiking […]
Unicorn Bites 8/4/14
Parenthood status: I can no longer distinguish between memories from my own life and scenes from “Frozen.” — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 4, 2014 I don’t know how you can consider yourself an adult if […]