Thoughts For The New Year
Since when has it been OK to put chocolate in breakfast cereal? If both cars and cows are contributing to global warming, why don’t we just cut the problem in half and ride cows to […]
Tag: Rick Perry
The Trump Cabinet Quiz
“Good morning, class. Today’s mid-term is on the Trump Cabinet. Yes the Cabinet changes as often as the definition of the word ‘collusion’. But reliable sources assure me that no Cabinet changes are contemplated for […]
We Are A Fly On The Wall At An Early Meeting Of Trump’s Cabinet.
“OK, are we all here?” demanded the President Select as he rushed in fashionably late to his own White House staff meeting. “Yes, Mr. President, all are present.” answered Kellyanne Conway for everyone. “Good, good!” […]
Inspiring Teen Uses Potato To Run Digital Clock, Envisions One Day Powering Entire Cities From Potatoes
HOUSTON, TEXAS – Inspiring local teen Frank Protsman won the Southeast Texas Regional Science Fair with an innovative clock which can actually be powered by potatoes. Amazingly, Protsman inserted electrodes into common produce and apparently […]
Rick Perry Unable To Keep Presidential Aspirations Closeted
Today Rick Perry came out as a candidate for President of the United States. He said he made the decision after years on his knees asking for more and more since his flame out in […]
Historically Unpopular US Congress Scores Top Ranking in Global Study
The US Congress has been ranked as the planet’s number one dead zone in a new scientific study. Dead zones are places where nothing happens and no life exists. Previously, the Kakunda Cavern Lake in […]
Man Wearing “Come and Take it” Shirt Has Very Little Worth Taking
Gary Brantley, of the suburbs of Del Rio, Texas, has a message for everyone. Come and Take It. He’s not entirely sure to whom the message is directed, but he really means it. “Everybody, I […]
Time To Bring In Mr Miracle
Among all the hubbub in Congress, a huge story got almost no attention last week. An amazing thing happened in the Senate, but few noticed because it was filmed by C-SPAN (that station really needs […]
New Texas Bill Will Allow Abortion Only Before Positive Pregnancy Test
The Texas state legislature, having already passed a ban on abortion after 20 weeks as well as a package of strict regulations which will force almost all of the abortion clinics in the state to […]
Rick Perry’s Mother Fights For More Effective Birth Control
In the midst of a heated battle over abortion restrictions in Texas, the mother of Rick Perry is asking for industry to create a more effective means of birth control. “Back when I got pregnant […]