Magic Will Make Me Rich
I recently took the clothes out of the dryer and found $1.36. I didn’t put that financial windfall in there. My wife says she didn’t. The two boys don’t go near clothes dryers. It must […]
Tag: Christmas
Bad Artist #12, Writing
FIRST WRITING HAIKU My novel’s stalled. How shall I save the hero? So I write haiku. SECOND WRITING HAIKU I can’t write the scene. Words fail me. I keep hearing, Iggy piggy poo. […]
Make Vote Buying Fun for the Whole Family
The campaign spending season is in full swing with well-funded politicians claiming that an enemy victory will result in a plague of locusts o’er the land. (It won’t happen at my home. I […]
Great Excuses For Late Homework
1) Teacher, I wrote my homework on paper made of matter. While I was walking to school, my homework paper collided with homework paper made of anti-matter. Woowee! It was almost the end of the […]
Bad Artist #9, The Scream
Fortunately, Mr. Munch, love the name, deposits his paychecks directly to the car dealership. And now a haiku for car repair bills. #$%@@! $%#&* %^(*{!@ !@#%*+ ++|! !@#@@## – Paul the Bad Artist […]
I Invite Syria’s Assad Over For Dinner and Root Beers
Bashar al-Assad, president and dictator of Syria is getting way too cranky and needs to step down. And if the only thing that’s making him cling so tenaciously to power is the lack of a […]
Down With Monday Holidays
I’m slogging through the Tuesday after Columbus Day like a drunk after a three-day bender. Yesterday’s government-declared Monday holiday tripped me up once again into believing that yesterday was Sunday redux. I couldn’t understand why […]
Our Land’s Welfare Leeches
The welfare system continues to spiral out of control. Millions and millions dollars of our tax dollars flow into the lazy mouths of these lazy bums who do little but sleep, eat, and make more […]
Like Moths to a Flame
Take my beautiful, adoring women. Please! According to the advertisements I get on line, there are literally dozens of beautiful women eager to have me invest in foreign currencies. Of course, this is all understandable […]
Bad Artist #5, Words
Haiku to Heteroskedasticity Some words are quite long Heteroskedasticity Is one of those those.* * = “Those those” because the last line needs five syllables. Haikus aren’t easy to write either. – Paul R. De […]