My Not to Do List – 5
I’m continuing with my virtuous inertia. Here are things I won’t be doing or eating today. 1) I will not cook or eat lutefisk. Cooking lutefisk in banned by the Geneva Convention. It looks like […]
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Ten Politically Correct Terms for Nasty People
Political correctness is rampant these days. I predict that it will eventually reach its zenith (or its nadir, depending on your point of view) and we will have to be careful even with the terms […]
FOX News Viewers Express Outrage Over Brian Williams Stealing FOX News Trademark of Lying
Recently NBC anchor Brian Williams was called out when he embellished a story of his reporting in Iraq back in 2003. Williams claimed he was on board a military helicopter when it was hit by […]
Learning from the Romans
In an effort to keep my aging brain cells from going AWOL, to take advantage of a great employee perk, and because I am a glutton for punishment, I am taking a class in ancient […]
Toilet Underbite: Bad Holiday Decorating
I’m deep into holiday decorating and now my toilet seat has an underbite. The threat of company has others garlanding hallways, but not me. I’m disgruntled at the ancient toilet seat in the guest bathroom. […]
Great Moments of Insight
“Insiders buy stocks for only one reason. They think the prices will go up.” – From an online advertisement. “Heat rises in Holland.” – Dutch real estate agent Whoa, slow down. Let me […]
How to Grow Up to Be a Writer (Part One)
Breakfast… Most people forget it’s even a meal. Others preach of it’s importance. For me, it was awkward. See my father was kind of a man whore, who always left me to clean up his […]
Bat Attack: Swooping and Swatting
Around midnight, a dark creature swooped into my living room, and I mistook it for a bird. When a rodent’s face fluttered up against mine, I whooped, the coffee table was upended, and papers went […]
Our Land’s Welfare Leeches
The welfare system continues to spiral out of control. Millions and millions dollars of our tax dollars flow into the lazy mouths of these lazy bums who do little but sleep, eat, and make more […]
Coming Soon! Edible Cookbook! Exclamation Points!
Disreputable sources close to me assert, “Shoestring Publications is about to set the book market on its ear.” You betcha. While most books can only be read or be used to prop open windows, […]