Unicorn Bites 9/20/14

I don’t care what the vet says. If your dog weighs less than 10 pounds, it’s a cat. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 20, 2014 4-year-old daughter: Why don’t you make milk for the baby? […]

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Unicorn Bites 9/5/14

4-year-old: Can we trade in the baby for a dolphin? Me: No. 4: But a dolphin can do way more tricks! She makes a valid point. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 5, 2014 Me: Did […]

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Sugartastic Daddy John’s Story.

Sugartastic Daddy John was in pensive mood. He didn’t like that there were many tales of Thirsty Dave, Scurvy Jane and Jill Y’s fascination with shoes but very few tales about his bad self. In […]

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What To Talk About When You’re Covering A High Speed Car Chase

In L.A., the high-speed car chase is about as common as Botox on a Real Housewife. There’s nothing better to break up the monotony of the day than to see The View suddenly interrupted for […]

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Unicorn Bites 5/20/14

How to ride a skateboard: 1) Fall down and hurt yourself. 2) Post it on YouTube. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 20, 2014 2: *points to pic* Horsey Me: No, that’s a dog 2: Horsey! […]

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How to turn a horse into a horsedog in one easy step.

We’ll start by saying that this is not, not cruel but most fun things are. Step one: Show your son or daughter (in my case I’ll be using my imaginary son) a picture of a […]

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