Lawyers And Cars
A friend of mine recently rear-ended a car while driving. She glanced down at her stereo for a split second and then crunch!! It turned out that the guy she hit was an attorney who […]
Tag: driving
Unicorn Bites 7/22/14
Wife: I need to get something off my chest. Me:*reaches for her bra* Wife: Are you really that dumb? Me: Wife: Me:*reaches for her bra* — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 23, 2014 Based on what people think of Marilyn Monroe […]
Unicorn Bites 7/6/14
Me: What’s that? My dad: A map. Me: A what? Dad: It’s like GPS for the Amish. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 6, 2014 Interviewer: Are you fluent in any other languages? Me: I speak […]
Unicorn Bites 7/4/14
[firework goes off] 2-year-old: *screams in terror* Wife: She hates it. Pick her up. Me: I don’t hold communists. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 5, 2014 Today we’re driving across four states with three kids […]
Unicorn Bites 6/21/14
Wife: Am I your best friend? Me: I don’t think my best friend should be someone I’m scared of. Wife: *glares* I stand corrected. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 21, 2014 Sorry my phone autocorrected […]
Short Time Left
I park the Driver Ed car behind the Community Center and go to find my student. When I enter the main room where we usually meet, he’s not there. So I go out front and […]
Unicorn Bites 3/20/14
3-year-old: Let me drive Me: You can’t reach the gas 3: I’ll use my hands M: How will you see? 3: With my butt M: *gives her the keys* — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 20, […]
Friday Humor Devotional
Dear Lord, please forgive my total outrage toward my CDL (Commercial Diver License) OTR (Over The Road) 18-wheeler driving, away-from-home-for-weeks-at-a-time husband, when he told me he’d signed up for the company’s free STD insurance. How […]
Unicorn Bites 1/21/14
Me: It’s cold. You need a hat. 3-year-old daughter: But it’ll mess up my hair. She put fashion ahead of comfort. She’s officially a woman. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 21, 2014 When my wife […]
Unicorn Bites 1/9/14
Dennis Rodman: *goes to North Korea* *wins basketball game* *kills Kim Jong-un* N Koreans: You freed us! D: Nope *becomes new dictator* — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2014 I saw a woman […]