Wisdom for Dummies
Tag: office
The Day the Coffeemaker Exploded
Inspired by “The Night the Bed Fell,” by James Thurber One of the most memorable days of my working life occurred the day I made the coffeemaker blow up. A couple of people in the […]
Daylight Saving Time Jagoffery
If you were late for work this past Monday and you claimed “forgot to change my clock” as an excuse, we’re calling the Bull$#@ card on ya. Just about everything re-sets itself these days… except of […]
Happy To Pee
One morning at work, I was on my way to the kitchen to get some milk for my cereal and wound up walking behind a […]
Unicorn Bites 2/11/14
Coworker: Today was perfect. Me: Was everyone in the office but me eaten by lions? Coworker: No. Me: Then there was room for improvement. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 11, 2014 An Iraqi terrorist in […]
Who Put This Banana in the Drawer?
I have a way of finding things in unusual places. Take, for example, the time I found one of my socks on the kitchen floor, next to the door. It was just one gray and […]
Bananacide
Something horrible happened at the office where my wife works yesterday. A bananacide. She and a co-worker stumbled upon a banana that had been brutally murdered. The police arrested an apple that was seen […]
Kathy’s Points to Remember: The Office
1. If you must call your boss a frog f***ing freak of nature, do not do it on Facebook. 2. If you must cuss in the office, do it in a language that nobody there […]
Kathy’s Points to Remember: The Workplace
It isn’t advisable to tell your boss to take the project he just assigned you and shove it up his ass. He might shove it up yours instead. It would be awfully embarrassing to have […]