Here Comes The Pope!
The Pope is coming, and Philadelphia is getting ready. Pope Francis will be in town from September 26 – 27, which the locals have begun referring to as “Pope Weekend.” Large sections of the city […]
Tag: Pope
Boehner Vets Pope’s Speech
House Speaker, John Boehner remains guarded about Pope Francis’ upcoming visit. “We’re walking on eggshells here,” says Boehner, “If we let the Pope address Congress with Jumbotrons on the Mall, next thing you know, we’re […]
A Day in the Life of a Vatican Sales Rep
For the first time in half a century, Vatican administrative staff will be required to clock in for work as part of a clampdown on slackers. Bloomberg News “Have you considered our get-out-of-Purgatory free extended […]
Unicorn Bites #525
Me: What did I tell you about being bad?! 4-year-old: Don’t leave any witnesses. I guess she does listen. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 10, 2014 Coworker: I don’t like chocolate or bacon. Me: Interesting. […]
Unicorn Bites #508
My 4-year-old daughter wants anything she sees in a commercial. Today I had to explain to her why I can’t get her Viagra. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 23, 2014 Navy recruiter: Any experience at […]
Friday Humor Devotional
Dear Lord, please forgive my husband for his lack of respect. When asked by our Pastor why he hasn’t attended church service in over a year his reply was, “I’ve been attending a new church, […]
Unicorn Bites 2/16/14
Wife: *cleans like crazy* Me: Calm down. It’s my mom coming over, not the pope. *my mom walks in with the pope* Wife: Mother fucker… — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 16, 2014 My 1-year-old figured […]
Vatican Says Popemobile Brake System Malfunction After Pope’s Conciliatory Comments on Gays and Abortion “Purely Coincidental”
A Vatican spokesman announced that any link between Pope Francis’ recent conciliatory comments regarding atheists, gays, abortion, and birth control and an accident where the Popemobile’s braking system appeared to malfunction is purely coincidental. The […]
The New Pope Fragrance
Excelsis Fine Fragrances has released a new cologne entitled Francis after the Pope. Arriving just in time for the holidays, the fragrance company is expecting big sales for nothing is more attractive to a woman […]