Paul’s K-IT-CHEN
Tag: kitchen
Toad in the Hole and how to Avoid Kitchen Murder
British Entree TOAD IN THE HOLE INGREDIENTS 1 cup flour ¼ teaspoon mustard powder ½ teaspoon salt 2 tablespoons butter 3 eggs 1¼ cups milk 2 tablespoons vegetable oil (2 more tablespoons later) 2 pounds […]
Are You A Restaurant Dick?
Are you a restaurant dick? Do you make other diners so miserable that they wish they were at the dentist instead? Take this test and find out. Do you: 1) Yell at the waitress? (1 […]
Tuna Burgers, Anti-grav Machines, and Dogs
American Entree TUNA BURGERS INGREDIENTS 2 6-ounce cans white tuna 1 celery stalk ½ small onion 1 Roma tomato ½ cup bread crumbs 1 egg ½ teaspoon dill ½ teaspoon parsley ½ tablespoon lemon juice […]
Bad Artist #18, Thanksgiving Preparation
THANKSGIVING HAIKU #1 Defrost, damn turkey! The guests will be arriving In only one hour. THANKSGIVING HAIKU #2 Feck! No potatoes! Dear, will you go to the store? What again? You dope. THANKSGIVING […]
Ugandan Chapati and Why Cooking Around Nitroglycerine is Bad
Ugandan Appetizer CHAPATI INGREDIENTS 1 garlic clove ¼ red onion 2 cups flour 1 teaspoon salt ⅔ cup water (about) 1 tablespoon vegetable oil (additional 12 tablespoons later) 12 tablespoons vegetable oil (1 tablespoon per […]
Happy To Pee
One morning at work, I was on my way to the kitchen to get some milk for my cereal and wound up walking behind a […]
Why During Christmas, You Never Forget Your Fire Department
Unfortunately, this is the true tale of the fire in my kitchen this past weekend. Please sing to the tune of 12 Days of Christmas. Don’t worry, I counted only to Five. I don’t want […]