Bad Advice Friday, 4-14-17
Today is once more Bad-Advice Friday. I shall be dispensing bad advice to all comers. The advice will stupendously bad. PD asks: How do I get the cat to emulate a dog? He never meows […]
Tag: english
The Fart Primer
Our schools teach us how to solve quadratic equations. Our schools teach us how to compose essays on 19th-century English literature. They do not teach real-life survival skills. Specifically, they do not point out what […]
Beans and Rice and How Carroty Omissions Caused The American Revolution
Cuban Entree MOROS Y CRISTIANOS (beans and rice) INGREDIENTS 12 ounces dry black beans 2½ cups long white rice 5 cups chicken stock 1 green bell pepper 3 garlic cloves 1 medium onion 2½ tablespoons […]
Chicken Piccata and the Escargot Express
Italian Entree CHICKEN PICCATA INGREDIENTS 4 (6 ounce) chicken breasts 3 tablespoons flour ⅛ teaspoon pepper ¼ teaspoon salt ¼ cup butter 2 tablespoons olive oil 2 table spoons chicken broth ¼ cup white wine […]
How I Will Save The World From Bigass Comets And War
If you’re like me, the thought of three-mile-wide comet striking the Earth terrifies you. I mean the last time we got hit by one, woowee, things were bad! We’re talking mass extinction with exclamation points […]
Super Duper Student Bloopers
I collected all of the following sentences and items from students in my college English composition courses over a 30-year teaching career. Most of the humor comes from sound-alike word confusions, typos, or misspellings. Our […]
Pork Colombo and How to Conquer the World
French Guianese Entree PORK COLOMBO INGREDIENTS 1½ pounds pork loins 2 garlic cloves 1 onion 1 tomato 3 tablespoons Colombo powder (See above recipe.) 2 tablespoons vegetable oil 2 cups chicken or vegetable stock 2 […]
Unicorn Bites #588
Languages my wife speaks fluently: 1) English 2) silent treatments 3) disappointed sighs — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2015 I just realized the year 2000 was 15 years ago. Excuse me while I pull […]
Pound Cakes And How to Find a Spouse
American Dessert POUND CAKE INGREDIENTS 1 tablespoon butter (2 cups more later) 1 tablespoon flour (3 cups more later) 3 cups flour 3/4 teaspoon baking powder 2 cups butter 6 eggs 2 cups sugar 1 […]
The Language of Learning.
I have an infinitesimal, Lilliputian, teensy-weensy vocabulary and culpability is not mine. When I was littler and I was learning words, there was just too many words to learn. Because of this, I became massively […]